If I were to die today and God were to ask me how I liked the last month of my life, I’d tell him it was a pain in the butt and that ASU sucks. July, for me, was nothing but running around getting ready for school. Part of that adventure was planning my transportation to and from campus, which per Google Maps is 14.8 miles away. While making these plans I was aware that ASU charged for parking. I didn’t realize how much. When I found out, I was flabbergasted. An alternative was necessary.
To quote myself from earlier this week, ASU charges an ungodly amount of money ($780) to park on campus and an unholy amount ($280) to park in their glorified park-and-ride known as lot 59 (1 mile away and a 10 minute bus ride from campus). Unbelievable! I will be attending classes three days a week this semester, and three or four days a week next semester… so between 90 and 115 days this year. At $780 for a year-long permit, it would cost me between $6.75 and $8.60 per day to park… or 2.5 hours a week of work. Oh hell no, I value my time and money more than that!
So I did what every other cash-strapped student does… I consider a lot 59 pass. At only $2.60 - $3.10 per day to park it was more reasonable. But the FLASH (the free bus that transports students from lot 59 to campus) is notorious for being overfilled and sometimes rejecting passengers as a result. If I can’t count on the provided bus to get me to class on time, why bother? ASU has a hard-to-use transportation services website that offered a glimmer of hope: the UPass. The UPass is an unlimited free-fare card for use on the ValleyMetro Bus and Light Rail lines… and is given to students for free. Further research on my part revealed the location of a free park-and-ride two miles from campus with regular bus pickups. My alternative was found!
During one of my many days getting lost in campus jungle of red tape with only a dull macheté as company, I noticed for the first time how big the campus actually is. Walking, I decided, would be a ridiculous waste of time. Thus, I needed a speedier form on non-motorized travel. Skates and Skateboards are fast–if referring to the speed at which the ambulance travels while transporting me to the hospital with compounded open fractures of the femur–but I needed something more subtle. A bike!
This one idea transformed my entire outlook on life. As my obsession with the bike idea grew, my continued distaste for high gasoline prices (20 cents a mile in gas, anyone?) and thieves stealing catalytic converters out from under your car while you shop for gummi bears and deordorant worsened. Suddenly the very prospect of the bike + UPass as a form of alternate transportation became the solution. So I resolved to buy a bike.
But remember where this all started? I am cheap. Er, economical. So I didn’t start my search for a bike at Target, I started and ended my search for a bike on Craislist. In 30 minutes.
Last week, I went and paid $50 for my bike. It isn’t a great bike, but a good one. Well, good enough. Its store brand (Murray), and was recently mechanically refurbished by a kind gentleman formerly a bike shop owner who passed his time in retirement warding off artritis by refurbishing bikes and selling them for nothing to young people and then using his time alone with them to convert them to Mormonism. He failed with me but we still had a good talk, and I still got away for only $50. I then bought a heavy duty lock, headlights and taillight kit, helmet, and some other accessories for another $95… bringing the total for the bike to $145… still half of the lot 59 parking fee.
Today, my day off, I installed all the stuff onto the bike. The new “comfort select” seat was a must… considering that I want my balls to still work after biking around campus all year. Minus a fresh coat of paint, it looked like new was deemed ready for my riding it.
Oh, what a joke.
I haven’t owned a bike for almost six years now… basically I got a car and then stopped using the bike. Go figure! I was a teenager with a driver’s license, I didn’t such a childish form of transportation any longer. As such, I also haven’t rode a bicycle in that long: 6 years.
Ever heard that phrase “its like riding a bike”? Y’know, that one that suggests that certain skills can’t be forgotten? Well, it would be nice if the term wasn’t a lie when taken literally. I was able to operate the bike, but I have forgotten how to ride one. I didn’t fall, but everything about riding like one did as a kid I now suck at. I used to be able to ride with no handle bars... now I can’t remove a hand without losing balance. I used to be able to take tight turns riding in circles with my neighborhood gang… now I need to three-point the neighborhood street! On my ride, I nearly plowed down two pedestrians. Its ridiculous! I shouldn’t be allowed on the road.
And now, as I type this, my legs are burning in pain. I rode 1 mile today… I’ll need to go 2.5 to get from the bus station to class. And then reality sets in…